When suddenly I realized there must be some mistake
If they know half the things I've done they'll never let me in
Then suddenly from the other side I heard those words again
~Love without end amen~ George Strait
How many people have often looked back upon their lives and came away thinking that they were among the condemned? That everything was over? I've often looked back on my own life and wondered just how a man such as myself could ever be forgiven for all it is that I've done. This is exactly why I often tell others that we, not the man next to us, are our own worst enemies. Sure, we worry and agonize over how others treat us or make us feel, but at the end of the day it is often those issues within ourselves which we fear the most. For me, it was that fear of not being accepted by others. Therefore, I slapped a tag upon others I met that they were the ones who had issues with me. Now, that doesn't mean that all of my conflicts with others have been due to my own fears, but a good portion of them have. I've often felt as if I were sitting in a courtroom while those around me passed judgement. After all, I was guilty, wasn't I? I mean, aren't we all guilty? Well, if we cherry pick the scriptures we can find multiple verses which tell us that indeed all have sinned and fallen short of our Lords glory {Romans 3:23}. I've even gone so far as to question God if He indeed condemned me even after providing for my sins to be forgiven. The desperate cry of a condemned man? What I will say is that I knew less about God than He did about me. It was never Gods intention to provide for our salvation only to suddenly jerk it away from us at the last moment. I did not understand that God deeply loved me despite my own imperfections. This was the God I never knew. Well, I did not know Him on a personal level. So, if Gods only thoughts of me were of love and grace, where did my own feelings of condemnation come from? Why did I feel as if I was a condemned man unworthy of my Lords salvation? Well, like I said, a lot of it was due to my own issues within myself. The guilt and shame of our own sin is a powerful weapon which the accuser uses against us on a daily basis. It has never been God who has whispered into His children that they are unworthy of His love due to our own sins. No, it is God who whispers to His children, "what sin?"
6knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be adone away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. 7For he who has died has been freed from sin. 8Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, 9knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, dies no more. Death no longer has dominion over Him. 10For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. 11Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 6: 6 - 11 NKJV
It is indeed a tough row to hoe when we come to the realization that we do not serve a God of condemnation and conviction but a God of pure love. I had a conversation with a good christian friend this week who was all about telling me that God was into the discipline of His children just as any good parent would. Well, I would disagree with that. What parent is there that would suffer the continual bad behaviors of a child and yet still come away with an even greater love than when they began? My best example of how it is that God sees me comes from my own family. I recall my own mothers anguish as my brother fell into bad behavior in his teens. Through her tears and prayers I saw that despite my brothers bad behavior, her love for him remained strong. Never once did she think of the discipline of her son, only that her love would somehow bring him back to what he knew was best. So it is with God. Despite our own history of sin and misbehavior, it is God who never angers, but agonizes that His children do not realize what He has already accomplished for them. I've often wondered how my own bad behaviors have broken my Lords heart. That, more than anything, is evidence of His love for me. It is God who whispers to us in those dark moments as we agonize over our own sins,"what sin, my child?"
~Scott~
No comments:
Post a Comment