Scars

~Down but not out at Wolf Creek~

26“Even so, Father, for so it seemed good in Your sight. 27“All things have been delivered to Me by My Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father. Nor does anyone know the Father except the Son, and the one to whom the Son wills to reveal Him. 28“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29“Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30“For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Matthew 11: 26 - 30 NKJV

I remember reading of a Vietnam war fighter pilot who in the years following his service to his country would all too often be frozen in fear at the very thought of getting into a airplane again.  This intrigued me until I read of that reason for his fears.  It seems that during the war he was on a escort mission over Hanoi, North Vietnam when he and his comrades came under attack from surface to air missiles and enemy fighters.  Through his seat of your pants flying skills and the advantage of technology, he and his backseater managed to escape the hell of North Vietnam in their damaged F-4 Phantom fighter.  Although it might seem like just any ordinary mission which many a pilot flew over Vietnam, this pilot would later recall that he lost a bit of himself on that particular mission into harms way.  What could ever make a highly trained and seasoned fighter pilot shrink back in fear of flying?  Only he knows the scars of that war which he carries with him, but I would agree that emotional scars often take the longest to heal.  I could spend all of my time scoffing at those who have been paralyzed by one fear or another, but until we see what they have seen we just might want to give them a little slack.  For myself, I have often held within me a fear of heights and flying in particular.  This was often brought to a head on one hike or another which Dennis and I chose to go on.  From Angels Rest in the Columbia River gorge to the Clackamas river trail, my fear of heights would take me to some pretty unfriendly places.  By that I mean that my fears took me into that world of "what if?"  What if I fall?  What if I get lost?  What if I hurt myself and can't walk off of this stupid trail?  All of these thoughts would all too often race through my mind as we walked the trail.  For his part, Dennis would all too often try to keep my mind occupied with possitive thoughts of ministry and Christ.  The funny thing is...it worked.  When I took my eyes off of what I saw in front of me and fixed them instead on who was in me, everything would change.  The negative of my fears would be replaced with the possitive of Christ Jesus.  It took awhile, but in my heart I knew exactly who I was.  It was after being reassured of this truth that I would be able to finally enjoy that journey we were on, and Dennis could stop worrying of his companion freezing in fear at each turn in the trail.

7And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. 8Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. 9And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12: 7 - 10 NKJV

I would add to the words of the apostle Paul from 2 Corinthians by saying that when I am weak...then He is strong.  For it is Christ Jesus who has taught us to take His yolk upon ourselves, to take upon us His burden.  Why?  Because that yolk, that burden of Christ is lighter than any emotinal load we could ever think of carrying.  When we are at our weakest, then He who is in us will be at His strongest.  When our eyes are on Christ and not that situation which we are in, then we will realize who it is that we truly are.  From my experiences on the trail with Dennis, I can attest to this.  I can see now why it is that Dennis would all too often bring up the subject of Christ on our journeys.  Yes, that is his ministry passion, but it was more than that to me.  For perfect love casts out fear {1 John 4:18}.  There is little room for our fears when surrounded by the love of Christ.  When we are weak...He is strong.
I don't want to say that my fears were realized, but on one of our recent hikes I came face to face with what I had once feared.  In the middle of the Wolf Creek trestle trail in the Tillamook wilderness, I injured my leg in a fall.  Now, keep in mind that when this happened, Dennis and I were on the FIRST leg of a 14 mile hike.  I still had to walk my way out!  Despite my mishap, many of the things I once feared never came to pass.  I didn't die.  I wasn't injured enough to be incapacitated.  Despite all that was going on around me, one thing remained true.  Despite my accident, Christ continued to have His place in me {Galations 2:20}.  It was through Him that I drew strength.  I was weak...but He was in me was strong!  Indeed, those emotional scars we often carry within us are far less imposing when we take on the yolk of Christ.  In Jesus there is no fear...only love.  And perfect love casts out fear.

17Love has been perfected among us in this: that we may have boldness in the day of judgment; because as He is, so are we in this world. 18There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. 19We love Him because He first loved us.
1 John 4: 17 - 19 NKJV

~Scott~