Proverbs (Mishlei) 7: 15 - 21 NKJV
The Complete Jewish Bible
A friend of mine sent me a link the other day on yet another institutional church remedy to the ages old issue of lust and/or pornogrophy. Now, as I have told him, if there is one thing I know it's how men get caught up in the darkness of pornogrophy. How do I know this? Because at one time that was the man that I was. The way that I see it, pornography is the cowards way out of any real relationship a man might have with a woman. Against Gods desires of a mutual relationship based on love, kindness and respect we create a one sided relationship whose only beneficiary is ourselves. Where God desires a partnership, we have created a dictatorship where the only person that matters is...me. Sure, we come up with all sorts of excuses to somehow justify our forays into the darkness of our own lusts, but it's still choosing our own will over Gods desire for us. I have been around more than a few men who have fallen victim to this line of thinking. Most recently with a coworker of mine. It's the man thing to do, right? If we somehow feel slighted in our home relationships, we use this to justify our relationship with the woman next door. We'll get ours no matter what the cost. All too often that cost is more than we bargained for. I know a man who justified a affair on his wife and ended up losing his family, nearly half of his paychecks AND half of his retirement pension. Tell me, was it worth it? Far beyond the financial loss he has acumulated is the torn relationship he now has with his children. Tell me, is this the life God desires for we men of faith? Well, according to a 2008 study, some might just see things that way. According to this study, the divorce rate among christians stood at 33%. However, in the same study, the percentage of christian men who viewed pornography was a staggering 50%! Does anyone but me see the this as a problem? I've given up talking about this issue as a problem with most men simply because most men don't see it as an issue. Instead, they see it more as a mans right of passage. What addiction program out there could we use to tackle such long held beliefs?
15Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world.
1 John 2: 15 - 16 NKJV
As I told my friend, when it comes to the issue of pornography and divorce, I know what I'm talking about. I've not only been in those trenches, but endured the effects of a damaged relationship with my own father who followed his own lusts while he was married. To me, this is personal. It's a shot across the bow of every God fearing christian man. It will consume our thinking and rip apart the fabric of one of the most meaningful relationships God has ever concieved. I am not a man because I have been into pornography. I'm not a man becuase I somehow viewed women as only there for my own satisfaction. This is not what made me a man. What made me a man was realizing who it was that God intended for me to be. The man God intended for me to be was never based on a world view, but on the reality of Christ Jesus in me {Galations 2:20}. Would any sane christian call Jesus a wimp, a sellout or a anything less than a man? Most likely not. Yet, I've known more than a few christian men who have disputed my own manhood because I don't uphold the worlds view of what a man is. If Jesus Himself is the prime example of what a real man is, then this is who I am. I am not speaking some kind of herecy, only what has been revealed in my own heart over time. The truth of Christ is that He lives in all who come to know Him. If Jesus was a man, then so it is for us as well.
Not so long ago I commented to a friend of mine that I no longer had the same desire to frequent strip clubs that I used to. I didn't come to this realization through a life recovery, twelve step addiction or some other institutional program. No, what eventually led me to realize that I no longer needed these things to make me feel like a man was the realization of who it is that I truly am. I'm not someone who needs to prove to others the kind of man that I am. I am Scott...and Christ Jesus has already shown me that blueprint.
19Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? 20For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body gand in your spirit, which are God’s.
1 Corinthians 6: 19 - 20 NKJV
~Scott~
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