That Thin Blurred Line

22Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26that He might gsanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 31“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Ephesians 5: 22 - 33 NKJV

I read something the other day that got me to thinking.  For it seems that a few male soccer players from Harvard university have behaved in a way that warranted, in the schools eyes, to have their season canceled.  What was their offense?  Being young men.  Seriously, these student athletes had the heavy hand of dicipline leveled at them for the way they viewed other female students.  Simply speaking, they rated womens soccer recruits with a numerical grade dependent on their attractiveness.  I read this and I cringed.  Conservative icon Rush Limbaugh has spoken often of the "Chickification" of our society, and to a point I agree.  Once again we've seen a good example of it, this time at Harvard university.  Now, before everyone jumps on that shocked and dismayed bandwagon, search back in your memories and see if you were not once guilty of doing the same.  For what did you base many of your physical attractions on?  Were you not involved in relationships and crushes with someone of the opposite sex whom you found attractive?  Now, you may not have attached a number value to their appearance as these young men did, but we've all nonetheless based our decisions on relationships and marriage partly on the appearance of the other person.  Despite what others may say, I REFUSE to see this as wrong behavior.  It is, at best, misguided.  To simply exercise human behavior, male and female behavior, is not wrong.  So, where does this behavior cross that line from simple attraction to unscriptural behavior?  I asked my friend Dennis that very same question recently.

18And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” 19Out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to gAdam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. 20So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. 21And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. 23And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” 24Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Revelation 2: 18 - 25 NKJV

Isn't it interesting that the scriptural reference for the word woman translates to "From man?"  For indeed it was by the rib bone of Adam that God created Eve.  Now, could God have created Eve from the dust of the ground as Adam had been?  Certainly, but as with everything, our Lord had a purpose in mind.  Do we dare say that our heavenly Father had the subjegation of women in mind here?  No, that was our own doing.  Which brings us to that thin blurred line which Dennis refered to in our conversation.  My question to him was something along the lines of, "How do we know when we've crossed that line in our relationships with those of the opposite sex?"  As usual, he handled my question with grace and experience.  That thin blurred line, he explained, is crossed once we began to see those of the opposite sex simply for our own gratification than for how our Lord created them.  This "self for self" mentality instantly turns any potential relationship into one of one person subservient to the other.  As the apostle Paul claimed in Ephesians 5, this definately is not how Christ loved the church, and it is not how we, as men, should love our wives.  This behavior is not relationship material.  Instead, it is simply seeking our own needs above anyone elses, and this is NOT from God.  Would those young men from Harvard have gotten in trouble for seeing the opposite sex as creations of God and not simply objects for their own gratification?  Probably not.  For not only were we ourselves created in the image of our heavenly Father, but so were those of the opposite sex.  Male and female HE created them.

~Scott~