1 Peter 3: 7 NKJV
The longer I live, I often realize that I may have been corrupted by my own generations desires. Of course, these desires are the very same men have had since the begining of time. For as men today, we often do not realize the importance of treating women as God would lead us to. "The game," as they say, is to seek physical contact with a woman before anything else develops. Welcome to the influence of my generation. My roots are pretty strong from a time when men were men and women knew their place in a mans world. See, this was the influence I received mostly from a fallen world. As I grew, it was common for men to be chastised for not being intimate with a female! I'd hear it in the workplace, from my friends and, believe it or not, more than a few churches! I recall one Sunday morning service where, after the morning prayer, a aquaintance of mine made the comment that he would have liked to "Get to know" a certain woman member of the congregation better. Of course, I knew what he was refering to, and it had nothing to do with friendship. I don't blame others for being shocked by this behavior, but this was how men were encouraged to act for generations. To not do so meant that your sexual preference was put into question. And who would want to be accused of that? And so we played the game. Of course, I often felt uncomfortable with the way we were treating others, but not uncomfortable enough to say anything in protest. I guess that's guilt by association. However, in my heart I knew that this was not how God intended the interaction between male and female to be.
For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church; and He is the savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh."
Ephesians 5:23-31 NKJV
It is in Ephesians 5 where the apostle Paul tells us of the proper marriage relationship. However, I believe this is carried over to courtship relationships as well. As Paul tells us, "Husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies." Far from being a controling, domineering relationship, this is a relationship of love and respect for one another. Many feminists have fretted over the idea of ANY woman being subject to a man. However, I don't believe this was where Paul was going in his description of a Godly marriage relationship. Far from it. For a man who loves his wife as he loves himself will indeed shower her with a affection seldom seen today. Think of how we view ourselves, do we not aspire to treat ourselves well? It is with this same love in which we treat ourselves that Paul encourages us to bestow on our spouse. What a joyous relationship will result when two people share such a unselfish union! Not only have I played the game, but I've been witness to the horrible consequences of what we as men have sown! For our own nation has some of the highest rates of divorce and single parent households. Welcome to the aftermath we've wrought upon ourselves! Thankfully, I've come to know the truth.
~Scott~
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