If Not Jesus

And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins, in which you once walked accordingto the course of this world, accorsing to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among whom we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others.  But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.
Ephesians 2: 1-6 NKJV

Honestly, I can't really recall a "Change" in myself over time since I have become closer in my relationship with Jesus.  I don't believe it's really something which we ourselves can track.  The first time I knew that something remotely different had happened within me was when a friend of mine one day made the comment that there was "Something differnt about me."  Now, at the time I really didn't realize what it could be, only that someone had noticed that something in me.  Now, I'll admit that I have noticed what we could refer to as Christ exemplified in others around me, but it's harder to see in myself.  My friend Dennis often refers to this presence of Jesus within us simply as a "Self for others."  As opposed to its polar opposite of a "Self for self" nature, it's easy to see how one would notice such a change in another.  There are no fireworks, no parades or speeches, but when we come to accept Christ Jesus, there's that "Something" which changes in us.  Gradually, we switch from being one whose focus is more on ourselves, to one whose focus shifts more towards those around us.  Trust me, it's not something Ican easily explain, I just know that it happens.  I often hear from those who knew my mother personaly of just how great a heart she had for others.  For my mother knew Christ Jesus and loved Him dearly.  The self for others in Christ personified.  I've seen this in others around me as well.  As I said, it's a whole lot easier to see in those around me than in myself.

Knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin.  For he who has died has been freed from sin.  Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, dies no more.  Death no longer has dominion over Him.  For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God.  Likewise, you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 6: 6-11 NKJV

Far from this being a writing praising the wonders of what I have become in Christ, I merely wanted to pose another question.  If not Jesus, then what?  In terms of my own life, if not Jesus, then what?  Where would I be?  Would I even notice that spirit which was within me?  If not for Jesus.  Well, Ephesians 2 assures us that, if not for Jesus, we also would continue to walk in the desires and lusts of our flesh.  One important point I want to bring up here is that one who once walked in the desires of their flesh was our "Old man" who was put to death with Christ Jesus.  This is important to remember because if not for Jesus, this is where we would remain.  For it is only due to our Lords great love and mercy for us that Christ became sin in our place.  The sin punishment we rightly deserved was laid upon Jesus at the cross.  While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us {Romans 5:8}.  This is sometimes where I find myself, wondering just where I would be, if not for Jesus.

~Scott~